


Red Camellias

by lostrose (orphan_account)



Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Genderbending, Hanahaki Disease, Major Character Injury, Not Beta Read, Rule 63, They/Them Pronouns for Oogami Kouga
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-17
Updated: 2020-01-17
Packaged: 2021-02-27 06:35:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22292686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/lostrose
Summary: Love is painful, love is never kind, but she does not want any of the feelings related to this cruel four-letter word to leave her body, even if it meant for her to be always one step closer to death.
Relationships: Oogami Kouga/Sakuma Rei
Comments: 2
Kudos: 17





	Red Camellias

She didn’t know love had to be so hard.

From what she’d previously read when she was young, love was supposed to be heartwarming, something to fill your life with joy and hope when everything around her is in distress. From what she’d watched from the films that she and her sister laughed at before, love was supposed to be something that you give to a person who’d make your life full, who’d be the so-called “light” in her darkest days. 

Although the description of love fits for the feelings of Rei Sakuma towards Yumenosaki’s self-proclaimed lone wolf Koga Oogami, it’s still painful, perhaps, that it had to be added with feelings of doubt that they would ever love her back and flowers. Petals with hues of whites and reds scattered on her bedroom floor, the first time happening the day before UNDEAD has a live concert scheduled where she has to perform holding all the coughs she need to let out back.

Rei tried her best to hide all the possible evidence of the petals, putting it inside an antique box given to her by her late grandmother. She also tried to vanquish all feelings for the girl who admired her from afar when they were still so young, but alas. Only the words of the possible reciprocation of her love could only save her now.

She could say that the two of them are close enough for her to invite the young guitarist to her home, since she could always excuse it as extra unit practice (“ _ With just the two of us? The fuck are we even going to accomplish without everyone’s opinion of how you handle the shit you need to handle as the leader?” _ ) or perhaps bond and talk about their plans for the Light Music Club once Rei graduates. Clearly Koga would have to let new members in, and she’s not hesitant at all about giving the leadership to them clearly when they have been handling things better compared to her who’s always asleep. 

Rei just feels like if Koga found someone in the new recruits for the club, her position as the so-called “Mother” of the club might be passed on to someone they’ll have their eyes on one day.

Still, Koga decided to agree to visit her home this weekend, but just for them to write their ideas about the songs that UNDEAD or the LIght Music Club could perform when there’s a chance. She can’t help but laugh at how shaky their voice had been when they agreed to her, cheeks dusted with pink and hands busy with playing with the straps of their guitar. She thinks that they’re so cute, so adorable that fills their heart with so much love a vampire could hold before they feel the urge to gag at the number of petals attempting to leave her lungs.

She succeeded in not letting the girl know about her condition before they left, although her final greeting of “Take care, Wanchan.” made them suspicious for they almost saw her cough up blood if she had not been holding a handkerchief in front of her face at the moment she coughed. She did receive a look of worry and a warning that if she does not take care of herself they will forcibly take care of her instead whether she likes it or not. Although Rei likes the suggestion, she’s not sure if they would welcome this disease that she has as a normal one.

She watched as they leave the music room, making Rei the only person left inside for the twins have not attended the meeting due to their unit practices. She’s quite thankful that she get to enjoy silence by herself, even if she would prefer it more if she would have the person she’d like as her beloved is with her. 

The silence is indeed deafening, highlighting her coughs, her hands holding tightly to her chest as she tries to even out her breaths and the  _ drip, drip, drip  _ of blood from her chin to the checkered floor. The stillness and the size of the room also maximizes her sobs, crying and upset about the fact that it is still possible that Koga might not like them back anymore. 

She is not blind to how they view the girl who already broke the hearts of many men and women alike. She sees how, despite all the harsh words and tone directed to the playgirl, they still value her so much, both as a member of the unit and as someone they now admire. 

But Rei still hopes. Hopes that Koga’s feelings towards Kaoru are mere admiration that cannot overpower the love they felt for Rei before. Hopes that Koga still harbors the same love and respect they had for Rei when they were younger. 

Rei now regrets about not noticing the girl’s light earlier, how they could and would possibly change her world with her words and actions. Rei regrets about the amount of time she could’ve spent with Koga, to know them better earlier and realize their own shine and talent and watch it bloom more as they grow. All she has now are regrets about the things they could’ve done to avoid this infection harming them from the inside. 

Rei is very much aware that there are two possible methods of the infection removal, and although one of them is preferable, the other could actually heal her quicker and faster than waiting for your loved one to love you back. She refused, of course, knowing the side effects and the things she would lose if she chose to remove it through surgery. 

Love is painful, love is never kind, but she does not want any of the feelings related to this cruel four-letter word to leave her body, even if it meant for her to be always one step closer to death.

She contemplated on telling them about her condition even before they thought of inviting them to their house, anticipating for a bit that perhaps if they realize that they still have the same feelings for the third year. Rei decides against it through and through, but thinks about it every now and then too. Koga’s response after she confessed is a matter of life and death, and since Rei refuses to remove the flowers through surgery, it is only a matter of time before her soul will be reaped by the grim reaper for such a foolish reason.

After weeks of thinking, she decided to just get on with it and confess her feelings for them straight away, which leads her to invite the girl inside her house. Rei made sure to keep the coughed petals hidden, not throwing them out despite being stained with the blood that came from inside her body. The petals are the embodiment of Rei’s feelings towards Koga, shoving it aside would mean that she’s shoving her love towards them aside too.

Rei felt a bit relieved when Koga first commented about how clean her room is compared to theirs and not the things that made her room different from a common human’s room. They did not mention the matte velvet curtains that really blocks the sunlight from getting inside her room, the dim lighting, the carpeted floor, the lack of mirrors, everything. They just noted on how clean her room is despite having a lot of space to throw trash around.

She advised them to put their guitar on the empty guitar stand that used to hold the guitar she used before she gave it to them. Rei, however, does not know if she should cry or if she should be mindful at how fast her heart beats when she’s around them or if she should be concerned about the feeling of something blocking their airway once more that makes it difficult for them to breathe. Who knows how by simply showing her the guitar she gave them makes her feel so much out-of-control love that produces multiple reactions inside her body, some not as safe compared to others. 

Is she really too smitten with love towards them now? Too love-stricken for the seventeen year old young individual in front of her who’s now leaning down, face marked with worry oh so close to hers that she could give their soft pink lips a peck. 

Rei have lost all the strength she has to keep herself standing, her legs not even reaching the bed before she promptly flopped on the carpeted floor, the flowers blooming almost nonstop now as they try to focus her energy on breathing and staying alive just for an extra hour, an extra minute, an extra second to see her beloved’s face before she ceases to exist.

She does not have enough time and she knows it. The medicines that she has been taking for the past few months, compliments from the purple haired girl from her unit whose brother also suffers from the same illness she has at the moment have stopped taking its effects on her body and marked this day as the day she vanishes from this world.

Her coughs are going nonstop now, with her unable to hold anything back anymore as she struggled to find air for blood to circulate around her body. Rei ought to feel sorry. After all, despite now being held in between Koga’s arms she is feeling guilty that she is staining their white shirt with blood stains. She attempts on apologizing, wanting to make the mood light but the “You fool, why didn’t you tell me sooner?!” stopped her from making any further comments. 

“Who is it, you idiotic, vampire bastard? Who could you possibly give your entire heart and now your goddamn life to? Are you fucking stupid?”

“Is there anyway for the person, whoever they are, to like you back?”

A fool she is to have hoped that it meant anything between the lines of them liking her back. They kept on rambling on with the words of wanting to kill this certain person for not having an interest in her as well without knowing that they’re the person they are currently talking about. It’s painful, it’s amusing, and it warms her heart so for seeing the person she loves talking about defending her even when it is all too late. 

“W-Wancha….  _ Oo...gami… Koga…” _ if a vampire’s grave could include their final words before their life is taken away, then these are the only words honorable enough to be engraved to her tomb. She has more to say, more to apologize for, but right now her time is up. 

Rei Sakuma chose this ending: to see her dearest, her most precious Koga and to die still harboring the feelings she has for them. 

**Author's Note:**

> i finished this at like 1AM and i still don't know if i did it good + i'd like to ask how well i did if it's alright?


End file.
